The voltage level at the headphone jack (across the other headphones, i.e. pilot and copilot), is about 2vp-p. Your Camcorder wants about 0.3V (dunno it that is rms or p-p?), so you need an attenuation of about 1:8. That is what the pot will do. You will be able to set the level as required. Presumably, there is some sort of VU meter, led or something to know if the audio level during recording is correct. I suggest starting with the Pot, and then after determining where it needs to be set, remove it, measure the resistance above the wiper, and below the wiper, and substitute two fixed resistors.
Headphone plugs on aircraft headsets are standard 1/4" plugs like you can buy at RatShack. Mic plugs are special. If you plug a mono (no ring) jack into an aircraft wired for stereo, you will short out one channel of the audio. I have had to cut off mono plugs on commercial headsets (David Clark), and replace them with a Stereo Plug just to avoid the short circuit. Modern headsets come pre-wired with stereo (tip, ring, sleeve) plug, and usually have a mono-stereo switch on the headset...
If wiring a mono device to a stereo plug, hook up only the tip and sleeve; no connection to the ring.