Retaliating door

Boncuk said:

That must be a complete misunderstanding. She treats everybody the same way, no matter if it's her mother, her sister or her friends. Slamming the door when I'm sleeping may have another cause. Thais don't think much, and if they think it's all too late.

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You still need to find out why, it might be more than just raging teen hormones.

Would you call it bad treatment if you help your daughter doing her homework or spend an extra PC for her to "play internet"? (Thai expression)

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Perhaps you're spoiling her.

It has already been talked about: Thais have a much different culture, a much different way of life and a much different attitude towards other people.

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Of course every culture is different and I'd be the first to admit that I don't understand your culture.

(They would even sell their grandmother if the profit was high enough, they even steal at their neighbor's without bad feelings)

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That sounds similar to some families here in the UK too, particularly in poorer areas.

Warnings and reminders are mostly ignored until it comes to the big BANG. I won't bother if my stepdaughter recovered back from unconsciousness (blackout in hospital and pay the cost for a good example of education. Unfortunately my wife is the most peace loving person on earth and the louder her daughter speaks up the lower she responds until I say a word of power. I have her full support in this matter, but I'm not around all day long.

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That's good she supports you which should increase your authority.

So what you booby trap the door and it hurts her?

How would that make anything better?

The chances are she'll soon remove your little actuator, she may even seek revenge and put it behind your door.

As good as it sounds I do not much like the idea of the door fighting back.

I would use the same slam detector to cause her stereo to go dead. Maybe even make the off time proportional to hardness of the slam.

3v0

Or have the door repaired and cancel her phone until the bills cut make up for the cost.

You're over complicating the solution.

2 options:

First is to put her up for adoption and get rid of the problem at source
Second is to get a load of those ultra bouncy rubber balls and mount a few of them in the door jamb. I reckon you'll get around 60-70% return off those

I have been around enough kids and parents and I have enough in site to simply ask that often over looked question of has either actually ever tried to sit down and talk about whats the real issue as individuals and not as parent to child?

Yes kids at that age are hormonally messed up but having a 'I killed 255 other humans that did not agree with what I believe is right' attitude is not helping either. Thats a rather sick and messed up thing to keep bringing up on a public forum.

I personally know some former war vets that have done as you and they say its horrible to kill someone let alone many and a few had some friends that boasted just like you about their kill numbers until one day they were found with their own head blown off by their own gun.

Some day your conscience will start to burn you alive from the inside out until the day you put a gun to your own head and pull the trigger. If it isn't already doing so a little bit now. Your arrogant attitude about killing other people obviously doesn't bother you now but I hope some day you come to change that attitude before it kills you.
You are sick in the head by the standards around my parts and someone like you would not be seen as a socially acceptable role model for children of influential ages.

I can live with the fact I do have some of my dads stubbornness and will but I least do my dammed-est to change it when I see it come out of me. Do you really want your kids to grow up and think that whenever they act like you they are ashamed of them selves and the life long influences you had on them? I wouldn't.

I remember my teenage years far to well and I would have listened to my parents IF they had ever sat down and talked to me with out and I am better than you because I am an experienced adult attitude. I had much respect for my friends parents and my aunts and uncles that were wise enough talk with me at that age and thats how I learned about the difference between earning respect and being stupid enough to think you can force it out of someone.

Since becoming an adult some 15 years ago we have had many healing discussions about how my brother and I were raised and both of my parents fully admit the had some messed up and selfish reasons for trying to force their will on someone that was smart enough to see that how we lived was not normal or right. I was not a bad kid and was respected by my friends and friends parents but my parents were not respected by most other people in the community as they thought they were.
To this day I am liked by people that dont like my dad or my mom and I am friends with the neighbors and their friends, they aren't and never where. To me that says I did learn something from my dad. How not to act or to carry a overinflated, arrogant, better than you ego!

I may have a naturally strong tendency to defy authority figures but I also am lucky enough to have the diplomacy and insite to try and look at what the other person does not like and reason out why they feel that way.

I dont need a physiology degree (but I do have some formal education in it by the way) to see your children are influenced by a very arrogant and shallow person with very questionable moral standards and a very narrow view of how the rest of society works. YOU are their role model and YOU should want them to be a better person than you when they grow up. They will grow and change and you need to do the same right along with them.

No one here knows everything about me and what I do in my spare time and up to now I have not once mentioned doing social mentoring or just being there for people or persons that are having emotional or communicational problems. Its non of anyone heres business as far as I am concerned.

No one here needs to know who and how many others I have worked with and kept from taking their own lives. Someone did it for me once so now I do it for others as well.
I have been told by many I should take up professional social and counseling work because despite my flaws I am willing to take on the hard deep issues without fear that others cant or wont. I have had to testify in court for a people that had stupid disagreements that came from simple lack of comunication brought about from over inflated egos and arrogance. I have gotten high praise from the judge for my approach and efforts and was ecouraged to continue to keep trying!

Dispite my dislike of your arrogance about killing other humans I still can and would drop my attitude about you in a second if I saw I could help you in a time of need. You have killed 255 people. But persons like me are the ones that keep people like you from becoming your own 256 kill some day.

Like me, hate me, call me a misinformed uneducated nobody with a complete lack of understanding, and anything else you want. I am a peace maker not a warrior. Because of that I have no one I consider an enemy and I sleep well knowing I have helped far more than I have harmed.

I really just cant see any problem with that door though!

How about a sound activated siren? It would be triggered by the slamming door or Thai rapper music played at a high level. Have it automatically time out and reset after a few seconds and await the next outburst.

tcmtech said:

You are sick in the head by the standards around my parts and someone like you would not be seen as a socially acceptable role model for children of influential ages.

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That's a statement! How do you know?

Kind of remote diagnosis?

... but I also am lucky enough to have the diplomacy and insite to try and look at what the other person does not like and reason out why they feel that way.

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That's another statement.

Don't you see the discrepancy?

Time to get grown up (really adult) and keep your BS for yourself instead of trying to sell it as a religion!

hi tcm,

You still have not said how many of your kids, you have raised thru the adolescent stage.

Ahhh, don't let any comments bother you, we are all different and with different backgrounds. Judging a person based on comments made over the internet is just silly. For some people, they are unable to properly articulate themselves with text, for others, the person may just misinterpret a post. It is so easy to misinterpret a post made by someone and derive a false conclusion of that person. We must remember that this is a very multicultural forum and personal thoughts may be misconstrued in the process. I chalk this up as a simple cultural miscommunication, and I am sure you might have a change of thought if you were to meet in person. Perhaps over a nice lager

Hey Boncuk,

As Mike said, I don't know anything about you, and my statements are just shots in the dark with the best intentions (based on my relatively short life experience)

Modifing the door would be funny, but it will give her more excuses (do not confuse excuses with reasons) to increase her rage even more. Same thing with modifyng her stereo, taking her cellphone or daring to touch a single hair of her allmighty tahi rap singer (well, at least she doesn't like Reggaeton, that's the worst sh...t our latin culture could ever make).

Your situation it's like World War I, each one is locked on its foxhole and ammo running down.

Ask her about a place she would like to go, maybe an student exchange or learning a new idiom. Sending her on a program (those where people go to work on another country, in a store etc.) would be even more effective, she'll jump like an ejection seat as soon as you say the words EARNING-MONEY

If your budget is not enough, as an emergency procedure you can ask her about a relative she would like to live with (temporary).

You may ask Damn! now I should reward her? Well, don't see it as a reward. It's more like an intelligent move camouflaged into a gift.

She must go out and learn new things, meet new people and why not, suffer some weather inclemencies to finally leave that stupid attitude. I don't know if there is an english equivalent for "You don't know what you have, until your lose it". But I mean losing real things, her home, her family, the easy life. Not a simple cellphone.

Both solutions also serve to let the things cool down. Everyone's mind will be in better shape after a rest. If you don't take inmediate action, the relationship with your wife can be damaged too.

EDIT: Man Forget the door thing! she may be facing the door instead of laying her back on it, so the pneumatic cylinder may blow her jaw.

And Tcmtech, you are right in some things. I don't know anything about raising kids, but I will save your suggestions if I see myself in that unenviable task.

By the way. I thing you TERRIBLY misunderstood the 255 thing.

For the ordinary civilian, most offensive things range from throwing a rock to the neighbour car, or cheating him with her wife.

When you are on a war zone, looking burnt people bleed or split in half, the "terrible offenses" from the civilian world become just kid jokes in comparison. I mean, what's a dumb girl screaming next to a 2000 lb bomb falling?

Like you, I'm a man who loves the peace. But I admite very much the ***legitimate*** military forces (even if some high or low ranked rotten apples commit injustices).
I politely ask you not to call somebody "wicked" "sick" because he was forced by the destiny to do a job that you (thanks god) got the chance to skip.

PS:
Before you ask, no. I'm not a soldier.
1) I don't have enough balls
2) I'm too lucky
3) I live in a beautiful city, in a beautiful home, eating gourmet quality food.

Only the poor people is forced to fight the damn non-sense nacoterrorist war that engulf the selvatic regions of my country

Sorry if I sounded preachy or how I may have over reacted. I have been around many people that simply have an attitude about killing for fun, sport or pleasure that are in general selfish, arrogant, cowardly in true nature and all around small bad people.

Having dealt with some older and some not so old war vets what I interpreted the comments as are something the society I grew up in would and does look down upon.
I regards I admit over did it some. I know war is bad and very hard on people I and everyone I know appreciates the things other did for our country but yet where live we do not take someone openly sounding boastful or proud of things they did or had to do in those situations.
As far as the having to do very bad things some times it happens but I have yet to find a reason to do them or a situation that could not be avoided directly or indirectly. I will not kill a person I dont know in cold blood based on someone else's reasons or information. I would have to know them personally first. How sick is that?

As far as the communications between parent and child well, I dont hide or Dinigh I had a bad life growing up and am thus naturally drawn to take the side of the child rather than the adult because of it. I was called a liar and worse for no good reason by people that boasted of their fairness and honesty. They were the liars and ones that did very hurtful things not me.

Tell a child they are a liar, useless, and a burden enough times while belittling their efforts by praising the accomplishments of other children that are in fact liars, cheats, thieves, vandals, and selfish little brats and well you get someone like I was when I was growing up. Sad and confused about life.

Kids have no experience with dealing with the problems and stresses of being an adult but adults have the experience of being a kid but unfortunately play down the seriousness and intensity that younger people feel things. Many of the things that stress out younger people are nothing to an experienced adult but that does not mean they dont matter.

I was told so many times growing up 'If you think you have it so bad now, wait until you grow up!' WTF?
I love being an adult! Simply because now I can either walk away from a person or situation with my middle fingers held high or absolutely verbally tare that person a new hole! Those two very useful and priceless options that you do not have as a child.

Its the actions our parents do that set up life long thought and emotional patterns.
My earlier posts were unfortunately part of my less than proper reactions I have to deal with from my having less than grand infuences during some rather crutial childhood developmental stages.

Sorry my fault. My apologies for reacting improperly on little information. I have acted like people I try so hard to not be like.

My comments may seam childish or whatever but hey so do most others around here from time to time!

..!.. ..!.. (and see me walking away now)

tcmtech said:

Sorry my fault. My apologies for reacting improperly on little information.

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Relax mate!

Most important thing, Let's see if any of the posted information finally helped Boncuk.

PS: This topic, and this forum, teaches that interacting with other people everyday is harder than fix a broken chinese TV set!!!

tcmtech said:

Sorry my fault. My apologies for reacting improperly on little information. I have acted like people I try so hard to not be like.

My comments may seam childish or whatever but hey so do most others around here from time to time!

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Correction! You have reacted improperly with absolutely NO information.

Even trying to lead you towards the theme of the threat you failed again and got more aggressive, not to say abusive. Having to handle a certain theme at school you'd busted every test for not keeping to the theme.

You really seem to have phsycholical defect left over from your youth.

(please note that I didn't make a statement like saying: "you have a phsycholical problem.")

Statements might be made if the one stating knows 100% of the reasons. Otherwise a statement is a lie in my opinion.

Double your age and add another 10 years to get to my age. I didn't proudly say that I killed in war. I said I'd kill if I get offensive. To make me getting offensive I usually had the other one have the first hit (at least attempt), and then hit back - absolutely deadly!

As far as I know US soldiers receive medals of honour for bravery. You might translate bravery that way: killing as many enemies as possible.

You should know Prussian (not Russian) soldiers. They are well known for outstanding self discipline. I'm a born Prussian.

You might call it instinct of survival or anything else. Last not least there is a lot of killing all over the world, may be as well in your neighborhood.

Wars take place to finally gain a higher profit. In ancient times wars were carried out for a woman.

And now a fatherly hint: If you try to clean up the mess in your neighbor's garden check your own mess before you go to that.

Boncuk

Boncuk said:

Correction! You have reacted improperly with absolutely NO information.

Even trying to lead you towards the theme of the threat you failed again and got more aggressive, not to say abusive. Having to handle a certain theme at school you'd busted every test for not keeping to the theme.

You really seem to have phsycholical defect left over from your youth.

(please note that I didn't make a statement like saying: "you have a phsycholical problem.")

Statements might be made if the one stating knows 100% of the reasons. Otherwise a statement is a lie in my opinion.

Double your age and add another 10 years to get to my age. I didn't proudly say that I killed in war. I said I'd kill if I get offensive. To make me getting offensive I usually had the other one have the first hit (at least attempt), and then hit back - absolutely deadly!

As far as I know US soldiers receive medals of honour for bravery. You might translate bravery that way: killing as many enemies as possible.

You should know Prussian (not Russian) soldiers. They are well known for outstanding self discipline. I'm a born Prussian.

You might call it instinct of survival or anything else. Last not least there is a lot of killing all over the world, may be as well in your neighborhood.

Wars take place to finally gain a higher profit. In ancient times wars were carried out for a woman.

And now a fatherly hint: If you try to clean up the mess in your neighbor's garden check your own mess before you go to that.

Boncuk

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He's apologised for goodness sake. Saying sorry isn't always the easiest thing to do so give him a break.

Boncuk, he appologised, it is not classy to taunt someone when they admit they were wrong.

Triode said:

Boncuk, he appologised, it is not classy to taunt someone when they admit they were wrong.

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to both of you, hero999 and triode (Paul).

Yes, he apologized to you.

But I guess none of both you were the victims of his rude attacks.

I expect an apology addressed to me!

Call it stubbornness. I can't help it. Apologizing at my neighbor for having ruined my garden is no apology!

I have mastered a lot of unusual situations in my life time and I will master the problem with my stepdaughter sooner or later too without using force. Her elder sister was the same way and we are best friends now.

Anyway, that threat showed the classic way what might happen talking about a technical problem.

Regards

Hans

But if someone ruins your garden the problem is more concrete. But as his wrong was just that he said things without understanding, it is corrected by saying that he sees that he is wrong.

If someone ruins your garden, then apologises repairs it better than it was before, then you should forgive them.

If someone mouths off, because they got their facts wrong which offends you, then they apologise you should forgive them.

Boncuk.
I do admit I was wrong and did over React. I am sorry. I dont know you in person and can only go by my interpretation of who you are by how and what you write.
Your more likely a good Person in the eyes of many and I most like misjudged you by my reasonings and measurement of moral character I based on the type of person I would assume you to be from your writing and observed comments about your way of handling things.

Again I am sorry.

However for the record you did in fact send me two emails in private over night that would clearly be taken as death threats over this misunderstanding.
I will keep them for some time now. Documented threat messages are legitimate evidence in court. However I really doubt you would cross half a planet to kill me over some thing as dumb as this. But I just dont know.

If they were meant with any seriousness I do stand by my observations that maybe you are really are sick in the head and in fact see killing other people as your way of getting personal satisfaction and your way with others.

I thought about it last night and had planed to make a full apology to you this morning any way. I know what I said was based on limited information and was most likely wrong but the two private messages rather point back to my earlier concerns and comments.

If a persons words can get you to the point of making physical threats about my disappearance I stand with my stated observation you do have something wrong with you. No apologies on that opinion.

I have made my formal apology as best as I can and I regret my over reaction towards you in whole. again I am sorry.

But still I dont take threat from near or far lightly and I have forwarded your messages to the administration here just the same so they are formally recorded should the unlikely event I would disappear and have my family wondering as to where I went.

I do have much experience with the military being we have an air base where I live and I know there are rules of conduct the military personnel live by outside of there work. Threatening a civilian the way you did would get anyone I know severely dealt with by what ever method the military does to handle it.
Your military training may not instill the discipline that it takes to be the better person in stupid situations (especially in one of limited information like in an online chat site) but the American military codes of conduct do!

I am a peace maker by nature but I still cover my butt when needed.

And as far as my age. Well if you doubled it and added 10 years you would be in your 80's.

Physically threatening someone over something so stupid would have me guess you to be in your mid teens and lacking the character and emotional maturity to shrug off others opinions about you.
ort of like what a boy that is around your daughters age is likely to react with at his age.

I am sorry this happened but still bring it on if thats how you really handle these kinds of situations! As childish as I may seem to you I dont have any reason to ever ever ever utter physical threats against people I do not agree with no matter what they have said and may continue to say about me. I can take it with little offense and actually use their comments to further look upon my self and further weed out my flaws.

Again sorry in many ways, but not all. (now)