Funny Mishale, though I refuse to provide the links you can easily find information on how to make a remote detonator on the net. You just don't know enough about electronics to understand them.
If you want plain English I'll give it to you, use a long fuse, light it, run away. When you get to your remote location and the fuse has burned all the way down you will get a remote detonation.
Neither a knife or a smoke bomb are completely safe and effective. A slight accident with a knife can slice open your arm, a bad one can leave you scared for life or dead . A smoke bomb accident could start a fire (it's an exothermic reaction it is not intrinsically safe) it could also trigger an Asthma attack in sensitive individuals. People die because of harmless little pranks gone awry. Again by your excuses and statement you're showing you do not have the mentality to atempt such a project, nor any sensible reason for it in the first place.